Delete it.

Since the last month, i had being ravaging my memories to write a story using MS words about us. Till now, i had written about 15 chapters. As i proceed on, i find it hard to continue.... The pain is too unbearable. I had no choice but to delete everything.

Adios.

Red Bull.

Has been surviving on "Red Bull" for the past few days especially during duty. Must say that it works wonder. It kills your lethargy and keeps u awake "ad infinitum". Yesterday, i book out in the morning after duty, then catch the movie "The bucket list" at Cine, and finally went to Chee's house at night to get some songs. When i reach home was about 12.20 am, and was really tired, but i dont wanna sleep that early, so get myself a red bull. yea.... That kept me awake until 4.15am for me to listen to some songs and read some books.

Anyway, 2 new movies which is a must see. "The bucket list" and "Be kind rewind". "The bucket list" is about 2 man, down with terminal diseases and have only about less than 1 year to live. So, they decide to prepare a list of stuffs to do before they kick the bucket. I think it is a damned nice show, but my fren finds it boring and slept for a short while in the theatre. God.... I just gaped at him, speechless. Will be catching "Be kind rewind" next week i think.

After so much things have happened, i really feel like going overseas to study. Just wanna take a look at the outside world and expose to an entirely new culture. I want to learn more things. But it is too late... ... ...

When i in NS, people just keep asking why do i go PJC and why i never apply for overseas university. Initially my reply is there are something more important on this piece of land, and i wanna keep this important thing in sight while at the same time pursue my passion in physics. Now, i will say, i start off with a wrong footage, and now i am facing the ramification. Of course, i believe we are a result of our own choice. I just gonna swallow whatever shit that has fallen on me. It is no one's fault but mine. In chaos theory, this is called sensitive dependence on initial condition. The only thing i can do now is to make those shit taste like... maybe chocolate? Well... till now the shit still taste like shit.

Slowly but surely, things will change for the better. I believe (blind faith!).

Music as my way of life.

Music can be considered to be one of the greatest invention my man. When u feeling down and listening to let's say, "My immortal", it's as though the song personify itself and keeps u company. Similarly, when you just get in love and listen to "恋爱-ing", it seems like the song is felicitating you. I may not be able to sing well, but i am glad that i can appreciate songs with my pair of ears. When going out, books and MP3 is like one of the basic requirement for me. In a sense it feels like i have 2 companions with me even if i am alone.

Anyway, yesterday i went to get some books for leisure reading. Then after some careful selection, i found this quite entertaining and "one of a kind" book. It is called "The freedom manifesto" by ToM Hodgkinson. Below are some interesting sentences extracted from his book.

1. 'people are dying of boredom,' and i believe this quite literally to be true. It would not surprise me one jot if boredom were one day revealed to be carcinogenic.

2. And veyr depressing it is that woman, too, have fallen for the career myth. 'My career is really important to me,' say the solipsistic new career ladies. How on earth bossing around a little coterie of idiots at Asda can be more important than playing with your kids, hanging out with your friends and family or doing creative things at home is completely beyond me.

3. You start out doing work experience, you graduate to being bossed around by idiots, you become idiotic and, then, if all works out well, you end up being the idiot who bosses people around.

Some interesting extractions to me. This book offers an entirely different perspective with respect to the social norms. So if you are having some free time, get this book and let it intrigues you!

Again?!

I have not being confined for longer than 1 week ever since the initial part of BMT, but now, i going to get confined again! Not only that, this time could span up to 5 freaking long weeks! When i knew this news last week, my thought was like, "OMG, OMG, OMG, OMFG, OMFG, OMFG!!!!"

In overall, i am still quite fine with this confinement, not really averse to it. Somemore, there are books, mp3 and bunkmates to keep me company. Everything will be just fine i think. One more good thing is i can save more money, instead of keep spending whenever i go out. Also, when the operation is over, it will be 6 months more to ORD. Hmmm.... there is perhaps one problem. Your birthday is on 05/05, hope i can be back in time and get your present.

Below are the photos taken during coy's outing.





























Yea... Need to use photoshop to edit a bit because the photos are very badly taken by one of my friend. Quite sad, i was busy taking the food and eating that i miss quite a lot of photo-taking session. Good thing was that 1 guy spotted me in the end, then asked me to join.

Ok.. Hail to Confinement. Bye!

Doing the wrong thing at the wrong time.

Finally back from my saturday duty. Slept only 4 hours during the whole 24 hours duty because my superior was around, and is not good to let him see me sleeping. Most of the time i am reading books and later at night, went to the recreation room and watch TV.

"I guess" really gives me a good laugh and when it comes to the couple part where the guests are supposed to guess which couple actually knows more about their the other halves, i was busy making comments. One of the guy proposed and cried in front of the TV. OMG!!! Can he please grow some balls?? This is a national TV! Actually the same things happen when i watching " A wedding Affair" with my friends. This is no time for being emo, sentimental or whatever. As a guy, if u aren't strong, u will be preyed upon sooner or later. So please.... be strong and stop the tears shit!

Last week is quite a dull week, no work for me and my friends, so we decided to bring in movies( Most provided by me!!). Thursday night, We watched White chick and brave story. Friday night, Click and lakehouse. Anyway, this is my second time watching click and i still find it very good. For lakehouse, actually my friend is not very incline to see because he keeps insisting the idea of 3 guys watching lakehouse sounds wrong. But eventually he still sees and it turns out that all of us are super engrossed towards the last half of the show. When Sandro Bullock decides to cease waiting and give up on keanu reeve, We were like saying quite unanimously," Fuck la, how come the girl so bastard."

Good thing is in the end, they both still miraculously met each other and kissed. Sweet scene plus happy ending. So glad i didn't waste my money to buy a lousy show.

Ok. monday to Wednesday is off days for me. Wanna catch Evangelion and august rush over this short break.

sky of love.

Watch "Sky of Love" at causeway point. A seriously touching show. Quite a numbers of girls cried in there. Even for a numbed person like me, there still tears in my eyes but, i never let it get out of my eyes. Haha! Furthermore it is a real story, which really bring us closer to the characters in the movie. Overall is a very nice show. For people that are devoid of feeling or brooding over their nihilistic life, i think this is a good show to get back your emotions and fill the void in your heart. I am so sure that i am going to buy the DVD if it is out.

A betrayal

I got this friend in NS, from RJC. He got this funny plan. He dun plan to get married or have children, only cohabit is allowed. And after his parents passed away and his brother is independent enough, he will go oversea and just get the doctor to give him an injection to let him die. Maybe at that time he may hesitate and withdraw his decision. That i will not know.

A betrayal by my own belief. Something i always believe and stick to very closely. But, it just dun work in this place(not that it is wrong). Is something like, what if all the fundamental assumptions in physics and maths are wrong(A belief supported by the science community). Almost everything will just go haywire and breaks down. It is about the same thing.

Damned... kind of hate my brain. Keeps on perceiving stuffs and processing it.

Feel like a carnivore.

Great, my OC asks the whole of ATGM platoon and me to go for a dinner at "carnivore" in Vivocity, since we won during the games day in Sentosa. Anyway is my OC treat! At first i am not very inclined to go, then since the PC and the men keep insisting, i think is better not to turn them down. So met up at 7.30pm in the restaurant itself, and there are people that are late for about one and a half hours.

They serve a lot of meats, like beef, lamb, chicken, ham, sausage, chicken hearts, fish and bacon etc. It is really meat, meat and only meat. Though i dun really like to eat meat, i think the beef are quite well done, then some others also have with it a unique taste. Overall, i think the food is quite good, just that it dun really suits me.

Hmm.... next week is a long week. 2 of my friends and me are to decide who is to do COS for next thurs, fri and sat. Well, i think all of us dun wanna do weekend duties, but in the end i volunteer. Because, i got the least to lose. Well, nothing in the outside world really matters that much to me anymore. I think i just need to stock up some movies, musics and food for my COS duties.

I seriously need to rethink my life a bit.

Yummy dinner.

Met up with kian and kong for dinner at "Waraku" in Marina Square. The food is nice, service is good and most importantly, they serve coke for waiting customers. Lol. But then, this kind of expensive meal cannot eat everyday one. Once a while is ok. With no photos, i dun see the point of i saying what i ate. Lol. Quite hard to imagine using words alone.

After that, bought a lego set. It has been quite some time since i build a lego castle.














This is the castle i bought. Looks quite nice. Lol. Because i keep buying toys, my mum keeps complaining i m childish, won't grow up. But apparently, there are people out there with their so called "maturity", still behave and think in a very dumb way.

Just realise something, people will always justify for themselves in such a way that it seems that they are right. Anyway, the most common form of justification is "Giving priority to our own self-interest", because after all, we hate pain but like pleasure. Well, if people think this is right, then let it be. Because, i have seen this in many cases that even i am sort of convinced.

Anyway, i think i may die early. Haha! My life too much sadness already and will affect the chemical balance in my brain and body. Like that more prone to disease. Lol. Sounds like self-fulfilling prophecy. Lol. Think too much already. Still wish to stay in this world for a long time. There are still lots of things i like about here other than those bad memories.

Ok.... lots of nice movies coming up. I think August Rush will be a nice movie.